[Note: an updated version of this can be found at www.cybrator.com (last item on page)].

Does a higher level of carbon dioxide dry out your mucous more quickly?

Many people seem to be suffering from "dry" noses and throats, and there is now a wide selection of saline nasal sprays at the various stores I have visited. I don't recall that in my past.

Mucous is your protective shield for the lining of your nose and the rest of your respiratory tract, is it not? Is it too being depleted?

How do I get a handle on this issue. How would I verify it? What would it mean? What would it prove?

While pondering this, I heard about the epidemic of tracheal mites infesting the honey bees, threatening them and the whole industry.

Hmmm, could I some how connect the two problems?

Do bees make mucous? Is it made in their trachi? Does it get there some other way?

Would mucousless trachi make better abodes for mites? (Can you visualize a multi-legged mite trying to lift one of his legs up, but it is mired in mucous)?

Despite the potential, investigating this just seemed too enormous, and there were other things which needed attention. Back burner stuff . . .

Then, I heard one of those "factoids" on the radio explaining why smoking bees (laying smoke on them, not rolling them up in a little rectangular piece of tissue-like paper and putting a match to them just before inhaling) makes them calm.

The announcer claimed that the smoke killed parasites on the bees' bodies, so the bees relaxed and enjoyed getting rid of their unwanted guests. I don't think this was part of a larger story. No reference or source mentioned. Just a tidbit and on to something else. That's a "factoid," I guess.

But, wow! Not only something about bees, but the suggestion that smoke could be therapeutic. Wow, wow, wow!

Enough incentive - - - to the bee books!

Smoking bees is an important tool in beekeeping. It permits the beekeeper to perform a lot of housekeeping tasks and gather the honey without the bees becoming agitated. (I recommend the movie "Ulie's Gold" if only for the bee stuff).

The books I obtained did not give the above explanation for why smoking calmed the bees. Instead, the usual explanation is some primal memory regarding forest fires.

When bees detect smoke, they gorge on the stored honey and then calmly wait to see if the hive is in severe enough danger to be abandoned and a new one found.

This explanation leaves me cold. Imagined gorging yourself on Thanksgiving and then sitting down in your easy-chair to calmly wait to see if that smoke you smelled while eating the pumpkin pie requires that you evacuate the premises. Calm? Intelligent behavior? I think bees are not that stupid.

I like the first explanation I heard better. But, I must be careful. My preferences don't count. Must be scientific. Must not ascribe human intelligence or characteristics to any critter even if these are my namesakes.

For my purposes, the first explanation also fits better.

Wait, could there be two different phenomena? The "factoid" never mentioned gorging on the stored honey? It seems awfully disruptive if the bees gorge every time they are smoked. Do they always?

Why would the beekeeper smoke the bees to collect honey if that makes the bees gorge on it? There's just too much honey is one possibility. They can't take it all. Plenty left over for the beekeeper.

Can't answer all questions this way. Need more input!

Smoking bees is a recommended treatment for one parasite, however. Get this, the beekeeper is supposed to put tobacco leaf in the smoker. It is the nicotine that apparently does the job. CAUTION: Bee careful! Nicotine can also kill the bees!

My head is spinning. How do I make sense of all this stuff?

Did the Surgeon General edit these bee books? Was "Christine" involved? Or, is this just the opposite? Smoke in moderation is good. It even helps kill some bad things, and may protect us? Set it aside!

The main commercial honeybee in the United States is the Italian. Two other species are the Russian and the Yugoslavian. Some how I now feel like a war correspondent. Hold on, we're discussing bees not Kosovo! (Wait! Sweet (honey sweet) Conspiracy Theory! Is that it? The whole Kosovo thing was really something to do with honeybees and not people)?

PROPILIZING? Say what? Isn't this a family oriented web-site? (Hardly, the kiddies shouldn't have to be concerned with such things). But, what is this "propilizing."

Propilizing is simply the gluing or sealing of cracks or foreign objects in the hive. It is the bees "weatherizing" plus some house keeping chores. (If they can't get it (for example, a dead predator) out of the hive, they propilize, ie., seal it up, just like the murderer who sealed the dead body up with brick and mortar in the new addition to the fireplace)!

Oh, my God! First the Surgeon General and now "Global Bill II" Richardson! The Department of Energy/Ecology/EPA lies have corrupted our honeybees! No wonder they have tracheal mites! Just like mom and pop and their off-spring suffering from allergies and asthma after propilizing their homes! The honeybees too have been snockered by that "weatherizing" crap!

Whoa, big guy, slow down! Take it one step at a time, ok?

Relate the bee stuff to this web site stuff. The bees that do the most propilizing should be the ones who are suffering from the most diseases, the ones who are most violent, the ones most likely to engage in "mass migration" (it's called "swarming" in beekeeper lingo, and if the bees swarm without the keeper being prepared, he could lose half the bees. They are off to find a new home).

Show these correlations and you have something, right? Easy, right?

Wow! A little further reading reveals that one recommended way to reduce the likelihood of or delay swarming is to provide better ventilation! Right on!

But, wait a minute. The ones who propilize most are least likely to swarm. Huh?

And, there does not seem to be any thing that can be said about disease. The results are mixed. Who knows?

Well, at least the gentleness trait seems to be with me. Least propilizing, most gentle. Less domestic bee violence in unsealed households, eh?

A small victory for my theorizing anyway. But, what went wrong? I thought I had nailed it. More CO₂, more disease, more violence, more mass migration, etc. What happened? Must I concede defeat? I've just been wasting my time? Can it be? Say it ain't so . . .

No data on relative carbon dioxide levels. Is there a different level that would be typical in the hive of each species? There's a research project a begging. Been done?

Are you aware that the queen bee controls all activity within the hive? She does it with chemical secretions call pheromes. Sealing the cracks increases the efficiency of the ventilation system and maximizes the effect of the queen's pheromes upon the bees.

Ventilation system?

Ah, I get it, my theories are intact!

You can have a ventilation system and still have high CO₂. If you are just re-circulating the indoor air without bringing in adequate fresh air from outside, ventilation can be useless or worse!

Bees are not that dumb!

They are not as stupid or gullible as humans. Bees do not put weather stripping around their front and back doors. They do not seal them. In fact, they don't even have doors. In fact, there is only one opening which serves as both front and back door. Wow! What was I worried about?

Bees are not that dumb.

Some bees stand at the front door and fan fresh air into the hive. Others stand at the back door and fan unfresh air out of the hive. Within the hive, the other bees orient themselves to fan the air efficiently throughout the hive! Imagine!

Where does "Global Bill II" or any government representative or agency tell you about an adequate fresh air supply? Why not?

We humans (species Americanus anyway) are expected to seal everything up tight. No open doors for us or our school kids. Not even a window that will open. If you are shot inside a school and need to get out, you must break the window out. Remember that boy at Columbine?

We humans are lazy compared to the honeybee. We allow our ventilation systems to fail, be turned off, be compromised, and to get filthy and breed disease.

May be that is on purpose. If the system gets dirty, that provides something besides CO₂ to blame. (ie., "it is the mold ("toxic" or "black," your choice) and scum growing in the system that are making people sick)."

How come we never hear about any heads rolling for allowing the system to get filthy?

It is never mentioned that molds and scum thrive on CO₂ or that people are getting just as sick where there are no molds or scum, that is, if you exclude the scum in charge.

So, the bees who do the most sealing may have the lowest CO₂ level. Who knows? But, at what cost? Strict discipline. A drug enhanced society, strictly regulated by the head female in charge.

I can't even claim anything about CO₂ and gentleness from studying the bee literature because after all is said, there is no data on the relative CO₂ levels.

I think I can safely say that the greater the propilizing the greater the authority of the queen through pheromes.

The greater the propilizing, the more ferocious the bees, the less gentle.

CONCLUSION: Bees controlled most thoroughly by the queen are the most ferocious. Do you see where I am going? Bring your drugs!

A little more bee info: It is CO₂ from humans and animals that enrages the African "Killer" bees. "Go postal," you winged, furry, black and yellow beasties, "go postal!"

(((Never did get to the bottom of the mucous problem, but I've got some more to say about that, and also about ants . . . "ANTZ." Stay tuned, ok?)))